#30: Officiate a wedding

They vested me power!

It all started in April. After one too many specialty cocktails made me wax nostalgic about love and friendship at our friend Courtney and Rich's gorgeous Florida wedding, I jokingly asked my friends Nick and Erica whyyyyy I hadn't been dispatched to make more speeches at our friends' weddings. I was throwing around words like "destiny", "cherish", and "a lifetime of happiness", things I rarely say non-ironically when not watching an episode of The Bachelor. I am clearly neither subtle nor eloquent when there's an open bar nearby.

Fast forward to late June. After attending a conference in Boston, I stayed through the weekend to visit the contingent of GW friends (+ significant others) who've settled there, including Nick and Erica. After an all-day pub crawl of the bars on Boston Harbor, we retired to their beautiful Beacon Hill apartment where, after inflating the Aerobed and rehashing the day, Nick and Erica asked me to officiate their wedding. Were they drunk? Were they joking? Or had what I said at Courtney and Rich's actually made them think I could handle this? They assured me they were indeed sober and serious.

Without hesitation, I said yes. I had no idea what to expect, but I think that was part of what made the idea so exciting. Over the next few months, we discussed loose plans for the ceremony: they gave me the general format (processional, welcome address, song, etc.) and sent me their vows and what they wanted to say when they exchanged rings, but with their blessing they let me otherwise take the reins and write the ceremony. Without their input. And they didn't want to hear it until the actual wedding. I think Joey Lawrence said it best on Blossom: whoahhhh.

So then school happened, and work, and life, and 4 other out-of-town weddings this fall. I did some light research -- emailing Nick and Erica's friends and family members for their input, writing down some choice quotes at other weddings, and soliciting scripts from friends who've also officiated -- but otherwise I put off writing the ceremony til after the semester was over. 

At home over winter break was when the panic really set in. I wrote furiously, then went back, edited, doubted, rewrote, and finally felt satisfied with the ceremony. But then, with more spare time on my hands, and the wedding just a couple weeks away, I started ruminating about the occasion. About the fact that my friends had enough confidence in me that they'd be willing to let me stand in front of them and everyone they know and love, and perform a marriage ceremony that they had never read or heard before and say words like "authority" and "vested" and then make them put on their wedding rings and then kiss and stuff. This...this was a big deal. 

HITCHED!

In fact, at the rehearsal dinner last Friday, I expressed these thoughts to Nick...how humbled and honored (and I don't throw those words around lightly) I was that they trusted me this much. He said how surprised he was that I didn't need any time to think about it after they first asked me in June, and I realized, as nervous as I was, I never for one second considered not doing it. That's the great thing about trust and friendship...when someone gives it to you, you just want to do the best and be the best that you possibly can, without thinking. And then, like now, I started getting all sappy and philosophical, except at the rehearsal dinner it was worse because once again, there was an open bar involved.

As for the actual wedding, it was amazing and personal and perfect and so Nick and Erica, from the song choices for the ceremony, to the slider bar set up during the reception (I still am thinking about those pulled pork sliders with cole slaw), to the beautiful and hilarious toasts, and to the groom's cake in the shape of a Boston Red Sox baseball hat.

And as fun as it was to get ready with Erica and her bridesmaids beforehand, to toast at midnight with all our friends, and dance and eat cake and celebrate, the thing I'll never forget came before the champagne bottles popped and the ball dropped. It came as I stood at the front of the room watching Nick watch Erica walk down the aisle, both of them having never looked happier, calmer and more at ease. I realized how lucky I was to be standing there, both literally and figuratively.

The ceremony itself went very well, eased immensely by the first joke I made where people actually laughed (and I, subsequently, relaxed). I think the calmness that Erica and Nick were radiating was contagious, because once we got into the rhythm of things, it felt really fun and easy. Quite a few guests asked me at the cocktail hour if I was planning on a second career as an officiant, and I told them that the joke's on them -- I don't have a FIRST career! So maybe, after I graduate in 113 days (but who's counting?), I'll throw caution to the wind, move to Vegas and open up a wedding chapel. Who knows, this Creverend act may have staying power.

What a crazy, memorable and awesome way to close out 2011 and start up 2012! I've had some pretty awesome New Year's Eves in my time, but this one takes the (key lime and raspberry Sox hat) cake. A huge thank you to Nick and Erica and their families for letting me be a part of their special day, and trusting me not to royally eff it up. And if you, dear readres, ever find yourself in need of some High Priestessing, you know where to reach me. I work for free (as long as there's an open bar involved). Happy New Year!

Pub crawling in Boston with the bride and groom.